Feb 20, 2011

The Fighting is Getting Harder!

It has entered the second week of my new semester. As I have been informed by the students from the higher level of my department, the second semester of my course is the busiest time of study. What they said is true. In the first week, I have been given so many assignments, reading books, making summary and conducting presentation. Besides it, I have to prepare proposal of my Thesis that have to be finished in the end of this semester. Now the schedules and tasks I have to do have been shown in my eyes. O_o I guess any students who ever have circumstances like me can imagine how busy I'm.

Life is LIFE. There are so many things to do in this life including to do tasks in my study. However, my task is not only to submit assignment for my lecturers. My status in this world is not only as a student.  I have the other statuses that each of them need my responsibility how I should act by having those statuses. Besides as a student, I'm also a muslim. There are obligations I should do as my responsibility to my Lord, Allah, no matter how busy I am with my affairs in this world. Sometimes it's difficult to control myself what things I should do first. Though I've learned how to make priorities in this life, in fact it's not always easy to be done. Sometimes, if I could say OFTEN, I've to force myself how to value my times by doing things that pleased Allah. 

Knowing that I will be so busy with my study in this semester. I try hard to do any assignment given to me immediately without any delay. Alhamdulillah it worked well! I've finished some of my assignments with satisfying feeling. I don't know how the result is, but at least I've done my best, as what I can. Ah... it's not last forever to be the same in that condition. :( It's not always easy to keep consistent in managing my time as what I plan. In fact there are so many things prevent me to keep consistent in doing something I have to do. The laziness intentionally come to disturb me. Things that are not so important also often call me to ignore my tasks, n.... feeling sleepy suddenly greeted me while I was so enthusiastically doing my tasks.  O_o 

Again I have to fight hard to come back in the best condition I can be. In my opinion life is not as serious as some people imagine. There are times when people can enjoy their time. They also can do whatever they intend and interest with in anytime anyplace. However things that they do should still be controlled by the right standard they believe in this life. Hence, as a muslim I try to take what is rules in Islam for solving any problem I face in this life. When I am in the stable condition and can think clearly, I remind myself not to forget what is the purpose of I'm created in this world. Allah doesn't create all human except to worship Him. That's why whatever I do, I hopefully it will be my way to worship Him. This is including when I am so busy with my study and doing my affairs or responsibilities as a student, daughter, sister, friend, member of society and organization, muslim etc. 

Even though these days I am so busy to study in my college, I manage my time to seek knowledge related to Islamic thoughts and try to share it with others, besides of course trying to understand and apply it in my own life. When I get bored to learn I also still have time to share with my family by phoning them, join with my friends, write something in this blog as my hobby especially the last few months, search something in internet or even just to update my status in Facebook, and do other activities just for the sake to get my spirit back and refresh my feeling. In reality,  sometimes I don't get my spirit back as what I want to, instead it makes me lazy in doing things I should do. Some of them have poisoned my faith slowly. O_o What's wrong?! Man is MAN. No body is perfect! Hmm... it's just the way I forgive myself when I start to lazy and can't control my own attitude by the right thoughts I've known... O_o Never take what is bad! I even hate my bad behaviors and try to change it... Although it's still in the stage of process n process... ^_

Believe or not, there's capacity for our mind to be serious or concentrate in learning something. As someone ever told me, concentration to learn  something last for approximately 2 hours. Then after it, we should refresh our mind by doing other things or  simply just praise or remember Allah. for a while. Of course, when doing something it doesn't mean that we forget Allah. All the time we do everything we should aware that what we do is also under Allah  presence. We have capability to do what is in front of us because Allah gives us power to do it. Then, to be remembered, in doing other things when we still need to concentrate in doing something, those other things shouldn't prevent us to come back in our previous activity if it has not finished yet. It's just the way to refresh our mind and we shouldn't forget what our main activities that have to be done first.


I don't know exactly it's the result of a research or not, but it does work on me. When I lost my concentration in reading my books, I try to vary my reading like turn from my Math books into Islamic books or listening to the music as one of my favorites or doing things as I mention before just checking email, searching in internet, etc... I don't wanna to be the one as psychotherapist who give advise others in manage their time. That's only some ways how I deal with my time, especially in the way I learn. In implementation it will be so complex as people have so many ideas, their thoughts and feelings are not always same time by time, moreover when it has been influenced by their mood. ^_ 

People say that saying is easier than acting. I do agree with that, BUT in some cases it depends on each person. For me, I have commitment to do what I say and what I understand. However because my spirit is not always in the same stage, no matter how so well I adjust myself to use my time in the best way, always there is way for me to waste my time in vain. O_o well! I'm not the perfect one in managing my time, I'm just the one who still proceed myself be better, especially in the Eyes of Allah. This life is like fighting for me and these days the fighting seems harder. This  fighting is not only to face things around me that are not appropriate with my understanding about rules in Islam so I've to try to avoid it, but also to fight my own wrong desire n intentions that merely come from my natural feeling without control of my mind. I realize that this fighting is never end till the time goes down. That's why I have to equip myself with faith and knowledge.  Now, it's time to enter the battle field again! ^_

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

:) wonderful job

Aliyatul Hikmah said...

Thank you... :)
Hope to do better...

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